Self-Love through Spiritual Growth- A reflective exercise

If someone were to ask you if you love yourself, your response would likely be "of course". But are you sure?

Sometimes God will put us in situations to learn how to truly love ourselves. Often times, God will use someone we love to show us how to love ourselves. Take for example a relationship that you've endured in which you stayed in way too long.

Was there some point that you "woke up" and said "I deserve better than this?"

Are you still settling, holding out that someone will change and eventually treat you the way you want/deserve to be treated?

Leaving a toxic relationship or other toxic environment (e.g., a job) is an act of self-love. What we must remember is that had we truly loved ourselves, we would not have allowed ourselves to stay in these toxic relationships/environments for long.

Self-love involves knowing our worth. 

Self-love involves deciding not to settle.

Self-love involves setting boundaries.

Most of all, self-love involves knowing what to and what not to accept.

Although there may be someone else who pushes us to the point of leaving, this someone else is a mirror unto ourselves. This someone else tests our self-love. 

When we find ourselves afraid to set boundaries for fear of being abandoned, we have some growth to do. What are we afraid of? This situation causes us to examine our fears and the root of our fears. Remember, perfect love casts out all fear. 1 John 4:18

When we find ourselves allowing ourselves to feel "less than", "unappreciated", "taken for granted", "inferior", "unworthy", we are not loving ourselves. 

What keeps us in situations where we feel "less than"? God says you are the head and not the tail, above and not beneath (Deuteronomy 28:13). But what must you do to allow yourself to truly feel that way? The verse shares the solution "if you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and closely follow them..." What is God telling you about the relationship/environment? Is He telling you to leave?

It is vital that we view ourselves and our relationships/situations from a spiritual lens. This is what leads to growth. It is unlearning all of the negative things we've been taught about life and about ourselves and instead focusing on God's Word regarding our self-image and promises for our lives.

What has God told us about who we are? 

I am the Creator and you are my creation. I breathed into your nostrils the breath of life (Genesis 2:7). I created you in my own image (Genesis 1:27). My eyes saw your unformed substance (Psalm 139:16). I knit you together in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13). I know the number of hairs on your head, and before a word is on your tongue I know it (Matthew 10:30; Psalm 139:4). You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).

Have you ever stopped to ask, “What does God think about me? Who does he say that I am?”

YOU ARE VALUABLE

You are more valuable than many sparrows (Matthew 10:31). I have given you dominion over all sheep and oxen and all beasts of the field and birds of the heavens and fish of the sea (Psalm 8:6–8; Genesis 1:26, 28). I have crowned you with glory and honor as the pinnacle and final act of the six days of creation (Psalm 8:5; Genesis 1:26).

  

What has God promised you? Are you living the life He promised?

I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.  John 10:10

Take a moment to reflect on these things......

Now, recognize that anytime you feel in opposition about what God says about you, you are not practicing self-love. Anytime you feel inferior, unworthy, etc., you are outside of God's declaration of you as a child of the Most High God. 

You must accept your worth in the eyes of God before you can feel worthy of HIS Promises. Abundance of life is not about money, but God promises you abundant peace, abundant joy, abundance in all areas of your life, so that your life may be full. 

Why are you giving away your peace and joy by remaining in a situation that is stealing it?

When you no longer settle, when you no longer tolerate being treated poorly, when you no longer attempt to hold out under the guise of suffering for someone else to treat you the way you deserve to be treated, then you can truly say you love yourself. You truly have experienced the self-love that leads to self-growth.

Meditate on these things to experience the spiritual growth that leads to increased self-love.

KjB